


Before we even knew what love was (I knew I loved you)

by socopotactico



Category: Glee
Genre: Fluff, Happy Ending, Kids, Love, M/M, Romance, Throwback, little angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-11
Updated: 2019-09-11
Packaged: 2020-10-14 12:29:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,877
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20600795
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/socopotactico/pseuds/socopotactico
Summary: Thinking about it, love never meant anything else than you and me.





	Before we even knew what love was (I knew I loved you)

Whole story’s in Kurt’s POV 

I could never forget those days when I was just a little boy and he meant the world to me. Some things change as people grow up, but some always stayed the same: I will always love him. 

When my father met Carole, I was only 10. Soon enough, our father and son afternoon became family days. I wasn’t really mad about it, I actually liked Carole and got along really well with her son, Finn. The best part of all of this was when my father and Carole would take me and Finn, to a surprise destination on weekends. On Saturday morning, I would pack a little bag with a swimsuit, games and snacks not knowing what to expect. 

On the other hand, my brother didn’t plan as much. Finn would throw a few things in his bag the night before and wait at the door for his friend to join us. I would get thrilled to see Puck. I never really understood why he was friends with Finn, we had many more things in common but it was fine. Since I didn’t have many friends and would have much rather spend the day stealing Finn’s, hanging out with Puck was more than fine to me. 

When I saw him walk through the door, with his same old black backpack and rockstar sunglasses, it always made me wonder, was that attraction? Could a 10-year-old kid understand what feelings are like? Wanting someone to be more than just your brother’s best friend could be explained by this one word grownups qualified of “impossible” for kids; love. To me, it sounded a lot like that and I wondered if he felt it too.

We would all hang out together since he was basically becoming a member of our family, but every once in a while I would feel closer to him. In the car, he would sit between me and Finn. While we talked and played endless competitions of rock paper scissors, sometimes he would hold my hand. Always inventing a new excuse, once it was that his hands were cold in the middle of summer, the next time he suddenly developed a huge fear of bridges. The one thing that always stayed the same was how tight he was holding onto me. 

That afternoon at the aquarium, while Carole and my father were helping Finn find a band-aid for his scratched knee, I remember them letting me and Puck go ahead and continue visiting on our own. They didn’t know how happy they made me by letting me alone with him. It wasn’t the first time I would be alone by his side, but it was the first time I could tell he enjoyed it as much as I did.

“Kurt, do you know what love is?”

He asked as we watched the polar bears making out. Thank god the adults weren’t around because they would have kept covering our eyes saying preteens shouldn’t be allowed to see such a thing. 

“Well, you see it’s pretty much when two people enjoy being around each other and never want to be apart.”

“Like you and I?”

He looked at me for a second before getting back to the bears.

“Yeah, pretty much.”

—

A few months after, it was the end of the summer, school had started a few weeks ago. My dad always said it was the best time of the year to go to the beach. I can’t quite figure out why he would think such a thing because the water was definitely too cold for me to even consider swimming. As much as I could tell Puck wanted to go with Finn, he stayed with me through the whole thing.

We were sharing a beach towel, I was on my end, reading peacefully until he took off his sunglasses and looked deep in my eyes. 

“Remember back in May, what you told me about love?”

He said as I closed my book, folding the 230th page’s corner. 

“Yes I do? What about it?”

“This girl at school just told me she loved me, but I don’t think I love her. I don’t feel the same way for her that I do for you.”

He said, looking down at his hands. 

“Are you sure that we are not just friends?”

I asked because as much as I wanted us to be more, we were too young for such a thing.

“Kurt, I don’t want us to be friends. I’m saying that I love you.”

With just one more sentence I created a silence between us that lasted throughout the whole day.

“Yeah, well you don’t know what love is!”

I shouted, not wanting to believe he did in fact love me the same way I secretly loved him. 

I learned something very important that comes with love that day; heartbreaks. Maybe the adults were right, we could not love. Kids were not capable of loving... but I still loved him. It couldn’t be anything else than love, when all I ever thought about was him and whenever we hung out together, wanting to freeze time so we would never have to be apart ever again.

—

The next time we saw each other, snow was already falling outside and fully covering the ground. I thought he must have been avoiding me, but what I couldn’t figure out was why. I didn’t want to hurt him, I hoped I didn’t. Every day asking Finn if he said anything about me, I was really worried he would forget me. 

That morning my dad came into my bedroom announcing we were going skiing, I couldn’t have been less excited. I pulled the blanket over my head and asked he woke me up when they’d get back, but he convinced me otherwise. 

“Come on, Kurt! I’m sure Finn and Puck would love for you to be there!”

“Puck will be there?”

“Yes?”

“Okay, I’m coming!”

I almost jumped out of the bed, eating breakfast as fast as I could, looking through the window until a white car pulled up. I stood still in front of the door and before the doorbell could even finish its music, I let him in.

I didn’t even let Puck get out of his snowsuit before throwing myself in his arms, holding tight. It was like I hadn’t seen him in years because this is what a few months felt like without him.

“I’m so sorry.”

I whispered in his ear.

“No, I am the one who should feel sorry. None of this is your fault. Let’s never fight again.”

I was fine with that. Promised myself I wouldn’t ever start another fight for such a stupid reason because he meant too much to risk losing it all. 

As much as it made Finn’s blood boil, Puck insisted on taking the chairlift with me. We could have squeezed the three of us in there but I wouldn’t complain if it meant getting a few minutes alone with him.

Through the whole car ride, I’ve thought about things I needed to talk to him about. This would be the perfect timing since no one was close enough to spy on us.

“About what you said the other day. I need to tell you something.”

I said softly, looking at my feet and the white peaceful world under us. 

“You don’t have to. It’s fine.”

“I know but I want to.”

I took a deep breath.

“We are too young to love. If we do this now, I’m scared it won’t last forever.”

“Dont worry Kurt, I fully understand. When you’re ready I’ll be waiting, until then, can we at least be friends?”

He asked and if I didn’t know any better, I would have thought he cried. There was still a doubt in my mind that behind that ski mask, he was hiding a few tears.

“Yeah, friends.”

—

I never thought he and Finn would ever stop hanging out, I never wanted to think such a thing. Eventually, they did have a pretty big fight which led to them not talking for a while. 

I just turned 17 years old and even if we didn’t go on weekly surprise trips anymore, the three of us still hung out every week. Me and Puck never spoke again of what happened between us for all those years but every once in a while I would look at him and tell myself that one day I would get him forever and all of this would have paid off. 

That night after the fight, I explained everything to my brother who encouraged me to take a step forward and speak of what we could be. 

I tried to fall in love with someone else, but after all the trouble I went through, my mind was still set on Puck. Maybe it was the time we would find each other again? I thought to myself. 

I grabbed my phone and dialled his number before asking him directly if he wanted to meet up. I joined him at Breadstix for dinner, confidence filling up my whole body, pushing away any form of stress that tried to affect me. 

As we placed our order I gathered the courage to finally say;

“Can we talk? I have something really important to tell you.”

“Are you finally going to admit you and I are meant to be?”

He said and I couldn’t tell if he was joking or if he was for real.

“What? I don’t- understand. Are you for real?”

“You said we were too young back then, but now I think I’m old enough to tell you that you were wrong. I can tell what love is and, I loved you back then... to be honest... I still do.”

“Are you for real? You better not be joking, Noah Puckerman!”

I said as he laughed at me.

“Let me prove to you that we are destined to be together.”

He grabbed my hand the way he used to do while no one watched in the backseat of my dad’s Jeep. Only this time, he wasn’t hiding. 

“What do you say?”

He asked as I could sense fear running through him.

“It’s time we finally make this right.”

I was blushing just like I used to whenever he told me he loved me before, but this time it meant even more because I knew that it was for real. We could actually be together and nothing could have made me happier.

“Kurt? I know I’ve told you this already a long time ago but in case you forgot; I love you.”

All the time I’ve waited to tell him this, it felt great to finally be able to say;

“I love you too, Noah Puckerman.”

We were still scared that we were moving too fast but for a second we forgot all of this and only focused on the chance we had to be with each other that night. And after all those years I think it’s fair to say, we were worried for nothing. Nothing ever broke us apart, and nothing ever would. We were in this for the rest of our life and we would enjoy the ride, together.


End file.
